Hello, allow me to introduce us. We are the three Muscarellas. Well, technically five humans and three dogs, but let’s be honest, we run the house.

My name is Sophie. I’m a seven-year-old French bulldog from Rochester, the first fur baby, and obviously the alpha. I’ve always been a diva and a smart one, too. When I first came home, my parents thought I was some kind of little alien because of all the noises I made. And don’t even get me started on when my mom tried painting my nails with her salon pawdicure stuff. I mean I’m already cute.

I was just a four-pound potato when I arrived, literally a birthday surprise for my big sister Giuliana. They put me in a box, and when I popped out? Pure chaos. Screaming, excitement, I knew right then I was going to be adored.

And I was. So adored, in fact, that seven months later, they brought home Bruno. He’s my little brother, also a Frenchie, lighter tan, and honestly adorable. But wow does he scream. Like actual screaming. My mom gets embarrassed walking him because people think there’s a child in distress. He’s lucky he’s cute. He’s also a total mama’s boy and gets very protective sometimes I can’t even get near her without him stepping in.

Just when we thought life couldn’t get any crazier along came Luna.

Now Luna is four years old, 95 pounds, and not a Frenchie. She’s what we call a “noodle” half Newfoundland, half poodle. She’s sweet, calm, and thinks she’s our size which is a problem when she launches herself off the bed and lands on us. We’ve tried explaining physics to her, but she’s the baby, so we let it slide.

We pretty much do everything together wrestling around the kitchen island, chasing each other through the house, and taking over mom and dad’s room at night. We’ve got a pool, but none of us go in it. Us Frenchies decided water is scary so now Luna thinks so too. We do enjoy our baby pool though just enough splash without the drama.

Our dad talks to us in this funny voice like we don’t understand him but trust me, we understand everything. We just have selective hearing.

If you see us out walking, you’ll probably hear Bruno before you see us. I’ll be busy inspecting every fire hydrant for suspicious activity, and Luna will just be happily soaking up attention like the big cuddly bear she is. We do accept treats, by the way.

Our humans keep us pretty spoiled. Mom owns a salon and makes sure we always look and smell our best even if we still manage to get stinky. Dad owns Muscarella’s Pizza, and sometimes we score cup and char pepperoni which is our favorite. Vinny is 23 and moved out, but when he visits, Bruno gets so excited he you know. Francesca, 18, also known as Frankie, is away at Florida State, and we miss her like crazy. Giuliana, 16, is the baby of the humans and gives the best snuggles.

Pretty soon, mom and dad will be empty nesters which means more attention for us, as it should be.

At the end of the day, we’re just three lovable little weirdos who are very, very loved. We get fed, exercised, snuggled and honestly, what more could a dog ask for?

And just remember if you’re thinking about getting a Frenchie don’t stop at one.