Kyle Arzaga. He will be 22 in June.

 

What has surprised you most about being a mother?  

How easy it was to raise him on my own...to shape him into being a good person and an incredible young man.

 

Seeing my son's achievements and successes. I also really love the strong bond and connection with my son.

 

What advice do you have for other, maybe new, mothers? Alternatively, what advice do you plan to give your child if he or she decides to become a parent?  

1. Do not revolve your life around your child. Incorporate his or hers around yours.

2. When putting the baby to sleep, make noise... vacuum, have the television on or do the dishes.  Training your kid to fall asleep with noise around will make your life easier! If you train them to sleep in silence, it will be a nightmare for you later.

3. Get the book 1-2-3 Magic for learning how to discipline your child. This was my Bible!! My kid thanked me for raising him the way I raised him because of this method!  It helps to manage the kid's expectations. It's a brilliant method and has proven to be successful. My kid will attest to it! 

4. Never just say "Because I told you so" to your child. Treat them as a human being and give them a valid reason in a way they can understand why. My son called me up from college just to thank me for never saying that to him!

 

What is the most valuable lesson you learned from your own mother?  

That love and affection IS important to give to your child, especially during the early development ages, as it gives them the sense of security. Tell your children that you love them. I never got that as a child and therefore grew up with lack of confidence and security. All the stuff that I wished my own mother had done, like making time for your child, engaging in activities with them and being present in their life; I made sure to be all of that for my own child. 

 

Anything else you'd like to share about your mom, or about being a good mother?  

To me, being a good mom is unconditional love; having patience and empathy; creating a safe and nurturing environment; active listening (really paying attention to your children's thoughts and feelings and respecting them); communication (being able to provide a safe space for effective open communication and being honest and respectful); setting boundaries (establishing clear expectations and limits while also allowing for flexibility and understanding) and lastly, trusting yourself that you raised your child the best way you knew how and trusting that they have learned from you well enough to approach adulthood with the confidence to be on their own. And always be there for them no matter what! Tell them that you love them!

 

I hit the jackpot with my kid! He truly is an amazing young man who is caring, thoughtful, warm and loving. He is so funny and so talented and is a great cook! Ah, I taught him well!! 

 

Time flew by so fast!  He's graduating this May with a BFA in Theater Acting!